"What is the matter?" she asked…
Sometimes it is not a matter of any one thing making me in a bad mood but rather just a pile up of stuff that just eventually wear me down. None of these issues on their own have gotten me down, but as a whole I think I am just worn-out tonight.
Most of the reasons I list here I take total responsibility for and I know I could correct or avoid on my own. This is not an excuse list but rather me trying to explain my mood of the evening.
I am tired.
I have not eaten well today. As of 9:00PM my total food consumption has consisted of: 1 can of root beer, 1 candy bar, 2 sausage burger patties and a swig of grape juice. I know I should eat better. I really planned on it. This is just how the day turned out.
Work has been putting me though an above average amount of stress. Nothing I could not get through, but made worse by the first two issues above.
I am extremely short on cash.
The past week I have been taking 180mg (per day) of a long-acting Beta-blocker I take rather than my normal about of 240mg. The change is not great in some respects but I have noticed it in others. I am wondering if I am noticing more of the anxiety I would have without the meds or if it is just a side effect of everything else going on in my life right now. Why am I taking less? Because, I need to get my prescription to last a bit longer. Expensive drug that I cannot go all the way off of but I am ok lessening…I need to make sure I have some to get me though any insurance coverage changes coming up. I have discussed it with my doctor and it is OK.
My grandmother called to say that my aunt, grandfather, and she are not going to be able to make it this weekend. My aunt is ill. My son and I are going to be busy Saturday with Cub Scouts. So, they decided that maybe that would try for another weekend. I actually am not surprised by this, I called and talked to my grandmother last weekend to verify they were coming and she would not commit to it. So, I kind of knew then. Tonight was just confirmation. I’d like to see my grandparents. They have not been here since I got married 6 years ago and I have only been back in my hometown a total of a few days in that same time period. I am not really a family person. I am one of those relatives you rarely hear from. But, I am recognizing that everyone is getting older and the number of days I may see my grandparents are getting less and less. “Sad but true.” (Oddly that was a line in a song I am listening to right now.)
Well, other than the headache that goes with the fatigue and not eating, that is the answer to the question of the day. I am not sure if they asked because they cared or because they were frustrated with me. When I do not sleep and eat, my memory of things like future schedules slip out of my brain and I was not remembering things I should know. I also forgot to do normal things like give my son the medications he takes every night. All are good reasons to be frustrated with me. Hopefully I’ll be better after a night’s sleep and a meal.
Most of the reasons I list here I take total responsibility for and I know I could correct or avoid on my own. This is not an excuse list but rather me trying to explain my mood of the evening.
I am tired.
I have not eaten well today. As of 9:00PM my total food consumption has consisted of: 1 can of root beer, 1 candy bar, 2 sausage burger patties and a swig of grape juice. I know I should eat better. I really planned on it. This is just how the day turned out.
Work has been putting me though an above average amount of stress. Nothing I could not get through, but made worse by the first two issues above.
I am extremely short on cash.
The past week I have been taking 180mg (per day) of a long-acting Beta-blocker I take rather than my normal about of 240mg. The change is not great in some respects but I have noticed it in others. I am wondering if I am noticing more of the anxiety I would have without the meds or if it is just a side effect of everything else going on in my life right now. Why am I taking less? Because, I need to get my prescription to last a bit longer. Expensive drug that I cannot go all the way off of but I am ok lessening…I need to make sure I have some to get me though any insurance coverage changes coming up. I have discussed it with my doctor and it is OK.
My grandmother called to say that my aunt, grandfather, and she are not going to be able to make it this weekend. My aunt is ill. My son and I are going to be busy Saturday with Cub Scouts. So, they decided that maybe that would try for another weekend. I actually am not surprised by this, I called and talked to my grandmother last weekend to verify they were coming and she would not commit to it. So, I kind of knew then. Tonight was just confirmation. I’d like to see my grandparents. They have not been here since I got married 6 years ago and I have only been back in my hometown a total of a few days in that same time period. I am not really a family person. I am one of those relatives you rarely hear from. But, I am recognizing that everyone is getting older and the number of days I may see my grandparents are getting less and less. “Sad but true.” (Oddly that was a line in a song I am listening to right now.)
Well, other than the headache that goes with the fatigue and not eating, that is the answer to the question of the day. I am not sure if they asked because they cared or because they were frustrated with me. When I do not sleep and eat, my memory of things like future schedules slip out of my brain and I was not remembering things I should know. I also forgot to do normal things like give my son the medications he takes every night. All are good reasons to be frustrated with me. Hopefully I’ll be better after a night’s sleep and a meal.
posted by MidwestMedic at 19:45
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